In a class all my own

I am currently taking a Lenten study class using the book Last Week by Marcus Borg and John Dominic Crossan. This study is looking at Jesus' last week (go figure) so Palm Sunday leading through Easter. It is an interesting perspective study through the book of Mark that challenges conventional Christian beliefs about Holy Week and about Jesus himself. I am thoroughly enjoying myself in this very liberal mind bending class. However, an interesting dynamic has arose.

Being the daughter of the pastor, I feel an odd mix of pressure and high standards on me during these classes. Many people believe that whatever my dad says, I will say and that what I know, I know from him. It seems to them that I am merely a puppet of my dad.While we do share opinions on many things, it is not always the case. I have a thought process all my own and many of the things that I say come from my own personal experience.

I also feel that I need to limit my views and what I talk about because I don't want to monopolize the class. I don't want to be that person. The one who is annoying and won't let anyone else talk. I especially don't want to do that as the PK in the class. That would be doubly annoying. "Oh, she thinks she knows it all because her dad runs the class..." That is one of my greatest fears for this class.  It is always a delicate navigation of politics and good social behavior.

I wonder what it would be like to be in a religious class and not be related to the teacher or the pastor of the church. My father and I talked about this last week. He wonders what it would be like to participate in a class that he doesn't have to lead. Where would that lead him on his own personal spiritual journey. Instead, we are both in the positions that we are and we must make the best of it. If there is one thing I am learning from the class, it is that I cannot let my fears stop me from living my life, Jesus did not let death stop him and I won't let fear stop me.  I have opinions, just as my dad has opinions and we will both share them with the world if it will help lead to lives that better reflect justice and equality.